For me, I have always struggled with being myself. Eating just doesn't come to mind. For as long as I can remember I've always had an eating disorder. I don't look at myself and think "I'm fat, I must stop eating" this was my struggle, to begin with. How can I have an eating disorder when I know I'm not fat? Food just doesn't register with me. I eat for survival. Not for enjoyment. That doesn't mean I don't enjoy food, of course, I do. I mean it in a sense that I don't wake up and think, oh it's breakfast. What shall I have? Or what do I want for lunch? Almost dinner, I fancy this tonight. This doesn't register in my mind. Sometimes I can go all day without food. Not that I'm starving myself because it's not that thought process. I just forget to eat. My day to day life is pretty hectic and I don't have break times for lunch, often I'm out the door by 6 am. Before I know it, I've missed two meals, times this by a week that's 14 meals. Times that for the month that's 56, and then for the year that's a shocking 672 meals I would normally miss out on. That's a hell of a lot. When you see that on paper it's quite shocking (embarrassing actually) I've always struggled with my image. This is NOT because I work in fashion. I think this is why I love creating images and running a magazine. I get to build on something I see, develop that concept and turn it into my own vision and masterpiece.
Now here's the challenge. I've signed up to Sam Callahan's clean eating and fitness program for 3 months. In the next few months Sam is going to kick me in gear and with his meal plan that I WILL stick too, we hope to transform my shape in just 90 days. I know this isn't going to be easy but I'm up for the challenge and pumped ready to start this.
Some of you reading this might be thinking, Sam Callahan. The guy from XFactor? What does he know about fitness and nutrition! Believe me, he does. And seeing his transformation over the months, if I get to half his shape I'd be a very happy man! The images speak for themselves.
I'm writing this post as a kick up the arse to get myself focused and to actually do something about my body. To put myself out there so personally is something that scares me, I cover my arms so they don't look so skinny, I've worn a padded vest out to make myself look broader.. this has been my secret. It's no secret anymore. I'm ready to do this and will embrace the challenges ahead of me.